I’m not sure why I keep doing this, but I have a painful habit of worrying about and trying to orchestrate the future. I’ve heard it stated (and maybe even mentioned it here before) that worry is a lack of faith. Still, I often try to get all of my ducks in a row, then rearrange them, then line them up in reverse alphabetical order, then…you get the idea.

It’s difficult to have peace when I fail to be in the moment. If I can slow my mind down long enough, I always realize how great my life is, how much God loves me, and how joyful I am to be a Catholic convert. One day, I hope that I will learn to find this peaceful state more quickly, before I lose two or three hours of sleep worrying about things that are beyond my control!

Truly, God does have a plan for me, and it is much better than what I could ever plan for myself. I have to continue discerning his will and deepening my conversion. More faith in God and his plan will result in less worry and more sleep for me.